Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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