mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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