I bet he comes in French.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
