You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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