what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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