I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
