And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
