You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
