I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
