i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize