Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
