i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
