Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
