she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
