So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
and you fell through a lawn chair
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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