I love black thongs
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
operation harelip BJ is a go
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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