I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
