hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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