I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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