Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
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Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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