As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
