Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
