is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
