$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
