It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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