today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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