How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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