somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
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I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
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Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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