if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
