Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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