Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
