i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just forgot I was standing up.
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