I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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