at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize