The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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