clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize