We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
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