I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
