Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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