rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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