I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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