I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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