who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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