i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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