You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
