i need an iv and a liver transplant
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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