planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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