Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
