went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
