Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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